NBA’s Expendables

The most anticipated game of the NBA season has been scheduled for Christmas Day. The Staples Center will be filled with the biggest stars in the NBA performing for the biggest names in entertainment. When the Lakers take the court against the Heat there will be three for sure hall of famers (Kobe, Wade, LeBron), three to four maybes (Gasol, Bosh, Bynum, Artest), and two instant hall of fame coaches (Pat Riley will be on the bench by this point). The first row will look straight out of the Academy Awards, filled with Nicholson and his mysterious white haired buddy, Sly Stallone and Dicaprio (who will quickly realize they have nothing to talk about), and Tom Cruise jumping onto his seat in excitement at every defensive three seconds call. The price tag for their seats?
22,942 dollars.

I think my goal in life is to make enough money that I could drop 20 grand on a basketball game and feel no pain whatsoever. Actually, scratch that, my goal in life is to make enough money that I could buy out the entire first row, fill it with homeless people, all just to see viewers scratching their head at the T.V. wondering, “How the hell did they get those seats?”

Imagine the celeb cam panning through the first row unsure if these were actually stars or not. "Did the Derelicte campaign gain momentum?" The image on the screen would bounce from one bearded man to the next with the caption “Joakim Phoenix?” underneath. I could see this being the next big reality T.V. show. You would have Ty Pennington go around big cities presenting the tickets to homeless families and capture the reactions on camera. It would always consist of the children running around in joy at the news of being able to see Kobe while the parents would stare angrily at the camera crew thinking, “You could’ve built me a f:-0ing house.”

But a Los Angeles Lakers ticket isn't merely access to an event it is a legitimate money making investme...

About the Author